Happy Halloween!

I think this year is the first Halloween that I'm not surrounded by bags of Halloween candy. Part of it has to do with my New Year's Resolution to maintain my weight. I haven't been able to quit drinking or (social) smoking, but I have cut down on my sugar intake by A LOT! It does make a difference.

Instead of pigging out on candy, I'll be at the Hip Hop Live! Tour with Ghostface Killah and Rakim. I'm going with friends, so it should be a fun night. Oh, I may pick up a bag of candy on the way. It is Halloween after all....

This song is one of the classics- Paid in Full, Eric B & Rakim

Sugasm 103

The best of this week's blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #104? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you're all set.

This Week's Picks
Urgent
"Feel the electricity from my fingers as I peel the damp cotton of your panties away from your sex, as I ease them to one side."

The Man From Del Monte Says...Yes, Yes, Oh God! YESSS!
"She let her lips and tongue explore me all over."

Traveling the road, Sharing a load, Side by side
"I guess this is not very sexy, my ranting about politics while playing with your cock."

Mr. Sugasm Himself
The US Constitution Erotic Coloring Book

Editor’s Choice
Dinner Date: Part 1

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot's Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Sex Poetry
It’s about priorities...
Orgasm - O-Vision

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Fantasy Football
Halloween…
In Need - Original Illustrated Erotica
Indian Summer
New Underpants
The Pied Piper
Tight
Touch Me Babe
A walk in the Woods

Sex & Politics
Love Your Body
Abstinence Only Sex Ed On the Ropes?

NSFW Pics & Videos
Emilia
Happy HNT!
HNT the Menstrual Edition
I Feel Myself
Sinful Invitation
Sugar and Spice

Sex News & Reviews
2257 No More? Let the amateur porn flow!
Asian Woman Bound, Tickled and Forced To Cum
DamNation w/ The Reverend Bob Levy
NEW Super Sexy Designs!
Sex Toy Review : Under the Bed Restraints
Welcome to "Birds are smart" by Penny

BDSM & Fetish
Anal Training Part 2 -The Entering
Anniversary Present: A Fantasy
Cyber or real!?
Disobedience
Don’t stop until I stop you
Face Slapping II
Flying
Hand Signals
L is for Look it Up
The Petting Zoo: Sex Camp, Day Two
Princess or Pervert?
Stiletto Mistress

Sex Work
Reality Check: Getting Sick

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
The Disclosure Dilemma
HNT - Half Naked Thighs
I Want to Fuck All of My Friends
A Prelude to an Eclectic Slut
Some Things Are Not Possible
Why was the sex so good?
Why We Aren’t Really Swingers (part 1)

It's Halloween weekend

I've had a long week, and I'm going to play all weekend.

I leave you with my favorite party song of all time:

It's about priorities...

the digital clock blares 2 a.m.
head throbbing from a late night
feet and legs still sore
he rubs my back
and i rub his

"are you tired?"
"are you?"

his hand on my thigh
my hand on his cock

"yeah, but..."
"still want to?"

you know your sex life is great
when no matter how tired you are
you still manage to fuck
even with eyes only half-open

Kis Lee 2007

Interpol 10/23/07

Last night's Interpol show was absolutely amazing. I have goosebumps just thinking about last night. It was the first time I saw them live, and I was blown away. They're one of those bands that sound even better live than they do on the CD. The lead singer's voice sounds so good, and the music translates really well when they're live.

When we arrived at the Forum, I was a little nervous. I thought the Forum was going to suck because it's such a big venue. We got there a little before 9. paid $22 (!!!!) for parking and made our way to the clusterfuck in front. If you had tickets for the floor, you needed to still stand in line for wristbands. We got herded like cattle, got our wristbands and made our way inside. The beer and bathroom lines were the longest I've ever seen in my life. I'm not standing in line for watered down Bud Light.

We finally got on the floor and they were doing sound check for Interpol. We didn't have to listen to the opening band...which i've never heard of. Interpol started 10 minutes later, so our timing was perfect. We were in the middle of the floor and the view was still great. I was impressed with the Forum's layout and sound system.

Interpol played a mix of songs from all three albums. They started with Pioneer to the Falls, my favorite song from their new album. I heard all of my favorites: Narc, Evil, Not Even Jail, Slow Hands, Rest my Chemistry, No I in Threesome. I totally wanted to hump the lead singer. They also played The Lighthouse which is one of those understated songs that didn't receive much airtime. It was pretty amazing. They played a bunch of other songs that I can't remember. The set list will probably make its way to Interpol's fan forum.

For their encore, they played three from the first album "Turn on the Bright Lights": Untitled, PDA, and Stella was a Diver... I admit that I didn't listen much to the first album, but now I will. The songs sounded spectacular. All in all it was a memorable night, and I'm so happy that I went.

Wildfires

This makes me sad and angry: O.C. Fire started as a controlled burn

I know mistakes can happen, but goddamn...

I saw the wildfires in the distance as I was driving home on Sunday night. I don't live near the evacuated areas, but I have friends who do. So far everyone is safe and sound, although I do know one couple who had to evacuate.

When I woke up, my eyes were all puffy and my throat was raw. The ashes keep drifting, and you can't get away from this nasty air. I read that the fires are only 10% contained. I hope this hell ends soon. It's scary out there.

Sugasm #102

The best of this week's blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #103? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you're all set.

This Week's Picks
She Told Me
"She told me she had a headache."

Fantasy: If you can't stand the heat
"You set the ice cube down and force my legs apart."

Sugarbutch Star: Bad Bad Girl
"I brought my lips down on hers hard, crushing, devouring, insistent."

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Upskirt Video from V Magazine

Editor's Choice
Blog Action Day: Sexual Activism or Lightning Doesn’t Strike Twice

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot's Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above within a week. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

BDSM & Fetish
My Wife is a Skank! pt2
Peep Show
The piss slit
Significance of a Collar
Under his Thumb

Sex News & Reviews
Featured Design: Go Ahead and Ask Me
My first speculum

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Capture
Faking It
Geriatric SEX! yeah. Part 2 of an interview with mimi about her (relatively) new relationship
Rant to follow!
Tantra and Kink: Energy Charge
The Grey Area
TMI Tuesday #105 (Dating Edition)
Top Ten Songs to Do It To
What To Do With Cum (Part 2)

Sex Work
Comfort Sex
Cuckold Fantasies and the "N" Word
Sex Work And Religion: Crucifixion

NSFW Pics & Videos
Catalina Loves Bondage and Nikki Nefarious
Cerydwyn (I Shot Myself)
Erotic Art Show: Houdini
Janette - Morning Blue
Jungbauern Calendar 2008
Naughty Nurse
Ron Harris Studio’s Latest Erotic Photo and Video

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Auto-erotic
Behind glass
Christening
Encounter 1, Part II: Disaster Averted
Find 'em, Fuck 'em and Flee
Honey I'm home.
How I Love The Fall
I need you, now
My Afternoon with Alejandro
Rubbing one out
Ruf <> Smooth
Sacred & Profane
Sex Tourism
Vignettes of a Cuckoldress

Interpol

Tomorrow I'm going to see Interpol at the Los Angeles Forum. I'll be somewhere on the floor rocking out to one of my favorite bands.

You've heard the phrase "music takes you to another place." Well, that is so true for me. When I was going through a low point, I discovered Interpol's second album Antics. Some say their music is depressing, but I say it's intentionally melancholy. The lead singer's somber voice matches their slow-paced melodies.

I love to listen to Interpol when I'm feeling down. If I'm sad or depressed, the last thing I want to do is listen to upbeat dance or pop music. Personally I want music to match my internal mood. I've listened to "Antics" over and over in my darker moments. Their music was perfect for moments of voluntary solitude.

Their recent album Our Love to Admire is a solid effort. I haven't listened it more than Antics, but it has the same sound that I love. I'm really excited about tomorrow. The tickets are for the Floor - General Admission so I might have to elbow some youngsters out of the way to get to the front.

Interpol - "Evil"

The lottery game

When I'm in the doldrums, I play the "what would I do if I won the lottery" game. Sometimes I play it with friends and sometimes by myself. The lottery game is completely self-indulgent and materialistic, but it's fun.

Last night I thought about the first things I would purchase:
* A MacBook Pro
* A Nintendo Wii for me and all my gaming friends
* flight and hotel package (for 2) to Japan
* 3 new cars

Those would be the initial purchases. I'm sure I'd put money down on a condo or something, but that would be later. *sigh* A person can dream, can't she?

Avoiding the shark-infested waters

While browsing writers' forums and blogs, I often read about publishing horror stories. The shady publishers, scam agents, deadbeats, cheats, and the other bottom feeders of the publishing world. I read these tales of woe, and I count my blessings. I've been a freelance writer for about two years, and I haven't experienced any of the nightmares that other young and beginnning writers go through. *knock on wood*

To date, there has been one publisher who has draaaaaaagged his/her feet on payment. I still haven't received full payment, but I'm optimistic. I still give them the benefit of the doubt. With that exception, my experiences with publishers have been top-notch.

I guess you can say I've been lucky so far. I know the scam artists and deadbeats are out there, and I'm doing my best to stay away from them. To avoid the scams, I follow a few simple rules:

* If the writing gig looks too good to be true, it probably is.
* Always get the contract in writing. Even an email agreement is better than nothing.
* Trust your instincts. If something smells fishy, watch out.
* Show professional courtesy at all times - the golden rule is a simple rule to follow.
* Never burn bridges until it gets to the point that you need to blow up the bridge.

These guidelines have worked well for me. I'm cynical in the first place, so my warning flags are hyper-sensitive. I'm willing to walk away from a gig if something doesn't feel right.

Of course I'm not just patting myself on the back. I've been truly fortunate to have worked with awesome editors and publishers. With the exception mentioned above, I have always received timely payment. I get positive feedback when I do well, and I get constructive feedback when I need to work on something. The publishing world is filled with a few predators here and there. For the most part, I have stayed away from the shark-infested waters. So far it's been a good ride, and I'm optimistic about the future. As the cliche goes, there's nowhere to go but up.

Auto-erotic

*adult content*

This weekend I was hit with the double whammy. I was still fighting a cold, and I was on my period. As a result, I was fatigued and my sex drive was way down. Sometimes I don't mind having sex during my period, but this weekend I wasn't in the mood. It tells you how bad I was feeling, because I am almost always in the mood for loving.

My guy was very understanding. I said we could fool around for a bit, but I couldn't kiss him. I didn't want to get him sick, too. After a bit of caressing and touching, I asked him if he wanted a blowjob. He said he wanted to wait until I was feeling better. Then he asked me if I wanted to watch him jerk off. I've never seen him masturbate before, and of course I said yes.

He got comfortable on the bed, and I stretched out next to him. He took off his shorts, and he started to stroke himself. I noticed how he touched himself, how he was almost rough with his cock. When I touch him, I stroke him with slow motions. He jerked himself with quick movements. He wanted me to talk dirty into his ear, but I was too distracted by watching. Instead I nibbled on his earlobe as he worked his cock.

It was the first time I ever concentrated only on him. He wasn't touching me, and I wasn't touching myself. All my energies were on the way his hand touched his cock. I could feel myself getting more and more aroused as I watched him. I caressed his thigh a little, but I didn't do much else. I wanted him to be completely comfortable with his motions. It was like I was watching him at his most intimate moment.

His breathing changed, and his cock got rock-hard. I knew he was getting close, and I found myself holding my breath. His hand movements remained in that steady beat, and I watched hi shaft become even more swollen. He didn't tell me he was going to come, but I was prepared for the moment. His cock spasmed in his hand, and he caught his come in a tissue. A few drops lingered on his tip and I helped him clean up. He asked if I enjoyed it. It was such an erotic experience. I loved watching his face and how his expression changed when he was close.

I know I'm going to fantasize about that moment. As soon as I'm better, I want a repeat experience. This time I want us to watch each other.

Poppycock

On Friday night, I went to the opening reception for Poppycock, an art show by Ben Templesmith. He is the illustrator/artist of 30 Days of Night which has been made into a movie. 30 Days... was the first graphic novel I read in one sitting. It's a smart vampire novel with amazing artwork. Since then I've been impressed with Templesmith's work in Fell, another graphic novel.

The art show was at a small comic book store in Silverlake. It was raining that night, but that didn't stop the crowd from showing up. The show featured Templesmith's cover art and prints from the movie set. The crowd was a mix of comic book junkies, Templesmith groupies, and those in the entertainment business.

Templesmith was a lot younger than I expected, maybe in his early 30s. He looked stylish in a black pinstriped suit and black Chuck Taylors. With his lanky frame and reddish blonde hair, he looked at home with the hipster Silverlake crowd. He seemed tired and jet-lagged but he was a good sport. I was smitten with his Australian accent. What is it about boys with accents?

I bought his Poppycock, a book illustrated with "leprachaun erotica." No joke. I'm not really a starfucker, and I don't really get autographs. This time I did want him to sign my book. As I was waiting for my man to get his book signed, I picked up another Templesmith book, Wormwood: Gentleman Corpse. I leafed through it and thought the artwork was grotesque and completely intriguing. So I bought that, too, and got back in line.

He saw me and said, "Ah, it's you again. You bought another book!"

I smiled. I am not really good at making small talk.

Then he said, "I don't know if you'll like this book. Maybe I should put a warning label on it. Then again you did buy the other one with erotica in it."

And it was on the tip of my tongue to say, "That's okay. I write erotica."

But I didn't. I got tongue-tied. Idiot.

I just told him how much I enjoyed his work. After he signed my book, he drew a little illustration of a man's head saying "hello!" I thought it was very cool.

I'm still kicking myself for getting tongue-tied.

Dear Ben -- if you ever stumble across this post, I was the short Asian chick in black glasses. You shook the hand of an erotica writer. How about that?

Lust, Caution

On my weekend must-see list: Lust, Caution - directed by Ang Lee



I'm a huge fan of Tony Leung. I loved him in Infernal Affairs and Hero. Since this movie is NC-17, I'm looking forward to some racy scenes.

In Rainbows

I spent most of last night listening to Radiohead's In Rainbows. The website has been super busy since yesterday, so I assume the whole world wants a copy of it. After two listens, I really, really like the album. I don't know if I love it yet, but I like what I've heard so far.

I've been a Radiohead fan for a long time. The Bends is one of my favorite albums of all time. From first song to last, the album is flawless. I loved Kid A and Ok Computer, not as much as The Bends but they are both solid albums. I liked Hail to the Thief, but I didn't love it. I loved some songs, and some songs left me hanging. Amnesiac was my last favorite Radiohead album because a few of the songs just sounded like noise. "Knives Out" was the only redeemable song on Amnesiac. I didn't care much for Pablo Honey either.

I was really looking forward to "In Rainbows." I wanted to know if Thom Yorke was making an album for the hardcore Radiohead fans or for the general public. My first impression is that In Rainbows will satisfy both. I'm having a hard time describing the album in a few words. It has elements of pop, rock, acoustic, and electro/synth. One song has a funky, almost danceable beat, and others are very melodic.

While listening to the album, the word "pretty" kept coming to mind. A lot of the songs really are pretty. They are designed to show off Thom's voice and his songmaking skills. Track 5 (All I need) is definitely my favorite so far. It's the melancholy love song that I always wanted him to make. Track 7 (Reckoner) is another favorite that shows off the musical range of Radiohead. It's one of the few songs that uses a tambourine to its advantage.

It's a short album with 10 songs, but I think that's a good thing. Thom Yorke designed an album that doesn't have any filler songs. His plaintive voice is as good as ever and I can't wait to hear this album performed live. I really think that this album can reach a wider audience than his last one, Hail to the Thief. I don't know if it's the best album of their career. I just know it's very satisfying to this long-time fan.

Here is a live performance of "All I Need"

In Rainbows

I wish I could write something sexy and erotic today, but I'm fighting this damn cold. There's nothing sexy about a runny nose and sore throat.

Today is a special occcasion: Radiohead releases their new album "In Rainbows."


You order it online and set your own price. You can also order the disc box which comes with a downloaded version. You may have to keep hitting Reload because the website has been super busy today.

I agreed to listen it with my guy, so I'm going to wait until tonight. If you're a Radiohead fan, you can not miss this opportunity.

Sugasm #100

[yes, those are my legs in the actual Sugasm 100 post...]

The best of this week's blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #101? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you're all set.

This Week's Picks
Do you want me…?
"The shiver that runs through you tells me everything I need to know."

Love that ass (his perspective)
"But as long as we are in here, she submits to my command; to my every whim."

Hubb and Spoeker
"He was good for show and good in bed, but an asshole in the real world."

Mr. Sugasm Himself
125 Magazine, Alternet and Enviromentally Friendly Porn

Editor's Choice
The very best of Sugasm…. so far

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot's Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
Being Stuck Outside
Dominance, Submission, Humiliation, Control
Miscarriage and Feminine Identity
The next colonel sanders or orville redenbacher
No more pen and sex
Sex on the first date???
What Is Mary Hiding?
Why "Sugasm" Matters

Sex Work
Do you like phone sex?
La Petite Mort
Sex Work And Religion: The Sex Crazed Pagan Cult Fantasy

NSFW Pics & Videos
I could watch her do laundry all day!
Just Teen Site Releases All New Nude Videos
Red Rose
Today’s Special Offer: Fresh Hamburgers

Sex News & Reviews
Belated Happy 2nd Blogiversary to My Bottom Smarts!
Fetish Film - How to Use Sounds (Urethral Sounds)
First Purity Balls, Now Integrity Balls
It’s HERE!!!! Miss Francy's "Spanking the Male Mind"!
Team Up with the 6th Annual Blogger Boobie-Thon

BDSM & Fetish
Back To School
Catalina loves Chat
Dancing with the Devil, a D/s Relationship
The Dungeon: Sex Camp, Night One
Fuck of a Lifetime
Harder….
Heat
I Got Your Number
Manhandled
Mira
My Wife is a Skank! pt1
A Nawty Story: Diane Phones Home
Objets d'obsession: neck corsets
Our game
Piss Slut
Who is Elise Sutton and why does it matter?

Erotic Writing and Experiences
100 Sexy
An Affair with the Wind
Corseting Mrs. Russian
Burlesque: Home Coming
Gamahuche
I Succumb to Jefferson’s Dastardly Lesbian Plot!
More Than A Breast-Fondle
The Morning Rollover
Party Blowjob - Part 3

Ready for Halloween

Halloween is just right around the corner, and a few parties are on the horizon. I still don't know what I want to be for Halloween.

I'm leaning towards Naughty Schoolgirl inspired by Go-Go (from Kill Bill)...



or perhaps a sexy Little Red Riding Hood...


only if I can get my man to go as the Big, Bad Wolf. What are you going to do for Halloween?

100 Sexy

In honor of the upcoming Sugasm #100, here is my list of 100 sexy things.

french kiss
bear hug
caress
kiss on the forehead
slow dance
strong arms
thighs
flowers for no reason
wet t-shirt
long eyelashes
fitted jeans
calf muscles
soft skin
nibble
lower lip
holding hands
dessert and sex
blindfold
body oil
wink
inside joke
whisper
goodnight kiss
5 o'clock shadow
broad shoulders
loosened necktie
boxer-briefs
showering together
massage
morning sex
spooning
afternoon sex
cuddling
midnight sex
breakfast in bed
post-party sex
sharing secrets
kiss on the cheek
white v-neck
bed head
full lips
jaw line
earlobes
husky voice
completely nude
making out
sleeping in
good morning kiss
falling in love
being loved

My sex life is boring

well, let me take that back...my sex life is really fantastic at the moment. My guy is the most generous lover I've ever met, and we've been tearing up the sheets on a regular basis. I'm getting great, toe-curling, mattress-grabbing, knees-wobbling sex. I do believe I've hit my sexual peak...

What I mean to say is that my sex life is too boring for a sex blog. Technically this isn't a sex blog, and I'm not a sex blogger. Technically. I'm an erotica writer, and I use this blog to post my writings and give you a glimpse into the daily grind.

Sometimes I find myself comparing my blog to all the adult/erotic blogs out there. There are tons of sex bloggers out there, and it seems like they're all leading such interesting lives. I bounce from blog to blog and I see writings from swingers, escorts, former sex-workers, professional dommes, bi-sexuals, D/s couples, etc.

And here I am...a straight woman who is mostly vanilla with a splash of kink. In comparison my blog seems so blah. Ho-hum. A few erotic stories here and there, but my personal posts seem so bland.

Then I have to remind myself...hey, I'm not a sex blogger. I'm not going to pretend to be something I'm not. I have to resist the temptation to spice up my personal posts. I've never been in a threesome and I probably never will. I've never worked as an escort, never went to a sex club, never had sex with more than one person at a time. If you met me, you wouldn't really think I was a smut writer.

This blog won't get as many posts as the popular adult blogs, but I'm okay with that. I think I'm okay with that. Don't get me wrong...I would like to be one of those bloggers who gets thousands of hits per day. But this isn't a sex blog. It's a blog by an erotica writer who enjoys sex. I'm going to try to balance the smutty posts with the non-smutty personal posts. As the kids say, I want to keep it real. This is me...sexual, a little shy, a little kinky, made up of many layers.

Sugasm 99

The best of this week's blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Sugasm participants. Want in Sugasm #100? Submit a link to your best post of the week using this form. Participants, repost the link list within a week and you're all set.

This Week's Picks
Don't think..
"As you read this, you reach for your cock and stroke it slowly, in anticipation of our eventual meeting."

I'll be out in 2 mins, I'm just brushing my teeth…
"One centimetre at a time, he slid oh so slowly into me and then retreated out again."

We all have Secrets
"I'll give you a little reminder - it was when he and his wife were making me cum so hard that I blacked out."

Mr. Sugasm Himself
Iris Bahr's Festive World

Editor's Choice
Letter to a Lover

More Sugasm
Join the Sugasm

See also: Fleshbot's Sex Blog Roundup each Tuesday and Friday.

(Sugasm participants should re-post all the links above. The following links may be excluded as long as you include all the above links.)

Erotic Writing and Experiences
Better than Cocktails
The Birthday Box
Burlesque: Getting Ready
Dab
Eponymous
Heaven
I assigned Kis Lee the word 'resentment'
In the city lights
Loaded
A Much Needed Climax

Sexual Poetry
Symplexity Presents: A Wild Ride

BDSM & Fetish
Arrival: Sex Camp, Day One
Boy Toy
Catalina loves Guest Cock
Counting the Days
Dizzy
Gloved
M is for Manhandled
Movie, tit whipping, and anal sex
No Big Deal… Or Not?

Sex News & Reviews
Happy 2nd Blogiversary to Always Aroused Girl!
Fleshlight Review
A Nawty Mouz’s Sexy Library of Kinky Linkies!
Violet Wands

Thoughts on Sex and Relationships
The 100 Unsexiest Men Of 2007
I think we broke my dick…
Not everything has a pre-emptive strike…
Now what?
Radical Fucking Honesty

Sex Work
Sex Work And Religion: The Pagan And The Jew

NSFW Pics & Videos
Antea & Christina (errotica archives)
Death or an invitation?
Friends, Frenemy’s, Half-Naked Peeps! Lend me your ears!
Half-Nekkid Public Exposure
Monique Alexander Nude
Monika - Chat Noir

Never kissed a girl

This weekend I went to a huge music festival in downtown LA. Lots of great dj's in an ultra-crowded venue. Plenty of eye candy and plenty of oglers.

I was with my lover and a few friends. As we were standing around, a cute girl walked by us. She was probably in her 20s, pretty face, slim, revealing outfit...basically every straight guy's fantasy. She looked at me and smiled. The smile lingered and she slid her hand up my bare arm. She gave me an obvious come-hither look, and I gave her a polite smile in return. I stepped aside to let her walk by and the moment passed.

My guy and his male friend looked so utterly disappointed. I'm sure they thought she was going to kiss me. Actually I thought so, too. She seemed interested, but I didn't give her an opening. I saw a lot of strangers kissing other strangers that night. My guy said if I wanted to kiss another girl, it was okay with him. I said I was sorry to ruin his lesbian fantasy, but it wasn't going to happen.

He implied I was a prude, and I took a moment to tell him how I feel. I'm very comfortable with my sexuality, and I know myself. I've had moments of curiosity about women, but I've never been attracted to a woman. Not enough to initiate physical contact. If I'm not attracted to a woman, I'm not going to kiss one. It's a simple concept, and I don't feel it's a reflection of prudishness.

I don't have a problem with straight women who experiment with their sexuality. More power to them. I do have a problem with straight women who experiment only to fulfill a boyfriend's fantasy. They kiss another woman to titillate their male counterparts. That's not me. I'm not going to change my sexual identity to please my man. I'm willing to compromise on certain things, but that's not one of them. I'm not homophobic; I'm just attracted to men (despite their flaws).

I told him how I felt, but he understood. He said a part of him was glad that I didn't. Now he knows that I'm not going to make out with some random stranger (male or female). I may be the only female I know who has never kissed a girl. A few of my friends have shared drunken kisses in the past. That's not me, and I don't feel like I'm missing out.

For the Cure

In case you didn't know, October is National Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

I've mentioned that I have a story "Sweet as Vanilla" in the anthology "Coming Together: For the Cure." Now this anthology is available in print. You can buy it here.

To make a donation, click the graphic below.